(Information from talkorigins.org and
biblicalnonsense.com)
I am going to talk today
about Noah’s Ark,
again, but we are going to focus on one aspect of the story – the water. Because you can’t have a flood without water!
Right?
Believe it or not, Creationists have not figured out any way that all
that water could accumulate around the earth, and how the animals could survive
the temperature if there were that much water.
So, we needn’t talk about
the size of animals on the ark, how they got from Alaska to the Middle East,
the number of “kinds” of animals, how their food could be stored and not get
moldy, or what they ate when they got off the ark and everything was barren, how
a dove brought back an olive leaf when there would not even be seeds
germinating, or the urine fumes on the ark– because they don’t even have the
water necessary for this wonderful flood figured out yet! (Of course it’s fun to discuss the other
things too, for amusement!)
Here are all the different
ideas Creationists have proposed for where the water originated from.
First, we will start with
the Water Vapor Canopy “theory.”
In case you are not up on
the latest, Answersingenesis now says that the “Water Vapor Canopy ‘Theory’”
should not be used, and give credit to their own researchers for this
discovery, of course. The Water Vapor
Canopy Theory was an idea from Creationists that all the water was hanging
around in the air in vapor form, and then it “somehow” cooled enough to drop
onto the earth as rain. But if it began
as a thick layer of vapor, with its accompanying pressure, any water from it
would be superheated! The flood waters
would be boiled away very quickly.
Noah’s little family that we are all supposed to descend from? Poached.
What about “It rained for 40
days and 40 nights.” Well, raining for
40 days and nights would raise the atmospheric pressure, which would raise
oxygen and nitrogen to toxic levels. The
water beating down on the ark would be at a rate of 6 inches per minute and
would quickly become too hot from all the energy. The heat generated by the impact of the
raindrops falling on the flood surface would have been more than sufficient to
boil the water and prevent it from rising.
Any way you try to make the fish swim – they won’t be swimming because
the water would evaporate from the intense heat. And you’d have a fish fry.
Next let’s talk about the
Hydroplate theory. This is where the
water came from underneath the ground. The problem with this is that you need
much more water than our earth holds.
The earth contains only 1% of the necessary water for the flood covering
the highest mountaintop, so 99% would have to fall from the sky.
Creationists describe this
water coming from underground as having volcanoes erupting underground. They try to make it seem all chaotic. But volcanoes erupting would just boil the water
further.
Next we will talk about what
I call the “Rocks Falling from Outer Space ” idea. Creationists have many different rocks they
think are responsible for the “world-wide flood.”
Kent Hovind proposed that
the flood water came from a comet which broke up and fell on the earth. He
actually did! Again, this has the
problem of the heat from the gravitational potential energy. The water would be
steam by the time it reached the surface of the earth.
Even if the water began as
ice in orbit, the gravitational potential energy would raise the temperature
past boiling.
As an aside here,
you know that crater called Chicxulub Crater? Kent Hovind thinks that asteroids hit during
this flood wherever we now see craters on earth, including this Chicxulub
crater (the one that made the dinosaurs go extinct). (Yet Hovind claims dinosaurs went on the
ark!) He proposed that asteroids hit
along with the flood (so picture that), but unfortunately for Kent Hovind, the
heat from the massive impacts would have immediately boiled large quantities of
the ocean!
The last thing we will look
at is the idea by John Baumgardner called Runaway Subduction. He postulates
that the earth was all in one piece, the Pangea, 4000 years ago (LOL!), because
you see, that helps with their story of how penguins waddled from Alaska to the Middle East.
(Another LOL!) Then he has the plates
tearing apart and the continents moving rapidly, by first having the land heat
up with friction and then cooling off, just because he doesn’t want things to
get too hot. The tearing apart of the layers and twisting, causes the flood to
come up from underneath. It sounds so official. But noxious gases like sulfuric
acid would erupt. The runaway subduction
process does not work and Baumgardner even admits that it would take
supernatural powers to make it work. He
also estimates a heat release of 1028 joules from this runaway subduction
process. The lava expected to accompany the subterranean water would also bring
the already scalding liquid to its boiling point. The oceans would probably be
vaporized!
So you see, the
problems of the water’s source and destination are massive since the entire
ocean should almost instantaneously be converted to steam with all their ideas.
In fact, the steam rising from the ocean beds would have been concentrated
enough to boil off the planet’s atmosphere with the runaway subduction idea.
In closing, Creationists
still have got to figure out how to get water for the flood, and find a way for
it not to burn Noah, his family and all the animals and fish to death!